Working Out With Mr. Love Muscle

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Let’s be honest, no one really likes working out. It is called “working” for a reason. It’s not fun. Plain and simple. However, to try and make it more fun a few of us got memberships at the same gym. But here’s the thing. As struggling 20-somethings, we aren’t rolling in the dough quite yet. So we’ve opted for one of the cheapest gyms out there (which will remain nameless to protect the privacy of the people listed below).

Recently we took a class with an instructor none of us had ever heard of before. WARNING: NEVER DO THIS. Ten minutes into the class we all regretted being there. It was a circus. So I decided to create a cast list of the people we encountered during our workout class in the twilight zone.

“Mr. Love Muscle” Our instructor was a 50-year-old Richard Simmons wannabe. Not only did he make uncomfortable gestures and references throughout the hour long class, but he told us the story TWICE about “working his love muscle.” I’ll leave it at that.

“Armpit Hair Woman” Front and center was an interesting woman wearing a wife beater with longer armpit hair than Hulk Hogan. Thank god we stayed far away from her. I’m sure that would have been an interesting smell.

“Butt Crack Man” Right in front of us was a man well into his 60s who couldn’t control his BO. Not only did he smell bad, but his butt crack played peekaboo as Mr. Love Muscle made us do squats repeatedly throughout the class. Not cute.

Moral of the story, scout out your instructors and class attendees before committing to an hour with these people. If you’re not careful, you will be scarred for life. Have you encountered interesting characters at the gym? If so, please share! We’d love to hear that we aren’t the only people who judge others while working out…

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5 thoughts on “Working Out With Mr. Love Muscle

  1. Haha, what kind of class was this? I am a fitness instructor, and your suggestion is actually the one that I give people myself – check out a class before you commit to it. At least you know what you’re getting yourself into then! Promise the right class for you is out there … this was clearly NOT it (yikes!!)

  2. Oh gosh, I’ve written about this before myself. The person that bothers me most is the excessive grunter–the men or women making ridiculous sounds when they lift 3lbs. or do a basic crunch.

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