Camping Tips For The Girl Who Doesn’t Camp

Every summer I commit to going camping. I don’t camp. I don’t like bugs, no electricity, no showers/bathrooms and sleeping on the ground. So why do I always agree to go camping? I love drinking outdoors with my friends… but I would just prefer sleeping in my own bed or at a hotel instead of on the ground with the bugs. Gross.

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So if you end up submitting yourself to a weekend of outdoor “fun”, here are camping tips for the girl who doesn’t camp:

  • Alcohol. Just make sure that there’s lots of it and start drinking early in the day. This makes sleeping on the ground a lot easier.
  • Shower as late as possible before you leave. I’d rather stay dirty than shower in a campsite bathroom. If you’re leaving to go camping right after work, take a long lunch and go home and shower at noon.
  • Must-Pack Items: Hair ties, tooth brush, facial pads, sunscreen, bug spray (lots of it), swim suit, flashlight, toilet paper, towel. Tip: “forget” tennis shoes so it’s easy to sit out during physical activities.
  • Check the Weather & Pack Accordingly. If it’s supposed to be above 90, below 50 or storming, just bail.
  • Bring Water. Keep hydrated if you’re drinking all day outside in the heat.
  • If you’re tent is big enough, Use an Air Mattress. Doesn’t make sleeping on the ground completely better, but it helps.
  • Go With a Camp Fire Expert. If you have to be outdoors for large amounts of time like this, make sure someone can build a fire. A campfire is a nice way to trick yourself into thinking your warm and toasty inside your living room. Bonus, fire helps cook a lot of delicious food.
  • Pack Comfort Food. When you’re sitting drunk by the fire getting bitten up by bugs, chomping on your favorite bag of BBQ chips, goldfish or cookies will make you feel better about the current situation.
  • Forget about Looking Good. Don’t bring make-up or any nice clothing you wouldn’t want to get all smokey, sweaty and dirty. It’s just not worth it.
  • BRING S’MORES FIXIN’S. Nom.

Any tips you’d like to share with me so I survive camping weekends?

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